Saturday, November 16, 2013

I have a rambling confession to make...

I am a native New Englander who hates winter.

Ever since I was a little kid, I've despised the cold. One of my earliest memories is being stuck in snow up to my shoulders, when I was a toddler, and having to have my dad pull me out. I never enjoyed the sledding, skiing, igloo building that other kids did. I didn't care that it signaled Christmas or Hanukkah. The dark and cold are miserable - period.

Snow is pretty, but I like it better when it melts right away. Shoveling is the devil's curse. And driving on black ice and snow? Forget about it. A fall on ice can be painful for days, let alone hours!

Did I mention I hate the cold? Forget sweaters, screw coats and gloves and snow boots. Screw the wet everywhere. Damn it all to hell; bah humbug!

The last few days have been unseasonably warm and magical. I love being able to go for a long walk or run in the sunshine. I love spending the days walking along a pond or by the ocean. I like being able to take my son to the park, if I so choose. I like being warm. I like iced drinks; especially iced drinks while eating outdoors in the sunshine. I like being able to breathe without a butt-load of mucus everywhere. I like not having to worry about dying in my car, because I spun out and hit an SUV.

The only good things about winter are all of the holidays and dark at bedtime. Despite familial and financial stress, people seem to be better to each other and a little more cheery around the holidays. Also, the death of all bugs - that's a big plus! No yard work and less shaving is also nice. I could also do without the 90-100 degree humidity of the summer, but regardless, it's better than freezing to death.

I tried many years back to move to the west coast,  but, alas, life got in the way. People tell me that if I moved to a warmer climate, I would miss the change of seasons - that things would be boring. I doubt that. It's not like I couldn't travel to snow. The best part about traveling to snow is being able to leave, when it gets to be too much!

There is a wonder to, say, swimming in the warm waters of the Blue Lagoon in Iceland, while the snow falls lightly around you; or walking across a well-frozen lake. Maybe I've just experienced one too many treacherous commutes in the slippery dark. I also hate being confined to the indoors for months at a time.

Give me palm trees and coconut drinks any day! You can have the fire place and hot cocoa...wait, that sounds pleasant...ugh, to winter!

Andy Rooney out
**drops mic**

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